Sunday Blood

I have a pretty good life - I probably don't have my fair share of really bad days. I am hoping that yesterday is not the beginning of a new trend.
Yesterday was probably one of the worst days ever for me! I am currently a Primary teacher for the CTR 5 class. They are 4 and 5 years old. There were 14 kids in the class, and they finally split the class last week so I only have 7. I absolutely love teaching this age (and I love it even more now that the class size is manageable) - they always say the most hilarious things...
Anyway, I only had 4 kids yesterday - you would think it would have been an easy day for me! As it turns out, it wasn't. I think the time change put the kids off their regular schedules so they were a little crazy!
My class consisted of 1 girl and 3 boys. The little girl, Kennedy, needed a "handkerchief" so I took her to the bathroom (which is right next to our classroom) to get a tissue for her nose. In the 15 seconds I was gone, disaster struck! I come out of the bathroom with Kennedy and all 3 boys are standing outside with panic stricken faces, and one of the boys - Thomas - has blood on his fingers from the back of his head - I know I was gone for less than 1 minute! I could hardly believe this was happening!
Anyway, so I make them all go back into the classroom while I take Thomas to find the primary secretary. While she went to find his mom, I got a wet paper towel and started to wipe the blood off of his fingers and neck. I asked him how this happened -

Thomas (in his adorable 4 year old voice): "Well, I was trying to pick up Eliot."
Me (in my trying not to cry voice): "Do you think that was a good choice?"
Thomas: "No."

Then Thomas' mom came and asked him what happened. Luckily, Thomas is her 3rd boy and she is a pretty relaxed mom. She asked him the same questions I did (which made me feel good considering my state of emotions!). I told her I was sorry that this had happened and explained that I was gone for less than a minute. She was very good about it and took Thomas to finish cleaning him up.

After church I had a little cry session with John about it. He is such a wonderful husband and always manages to put things into perspective - "They are boys!" I guess I was thinking that they would be fine for a few seconds... but I forgot about the "boy" factor! I still felt bad, but have made sure to put a pack of tissues in my primary bag so I don't have to leave the room.

I called Thomas later to make sure that he was still okay - which he was, thankfully! It was just a little scratch. Can I just say how lucky I am that it was this child it happened to? His parents are very easy-going and laughed about the incident. They told me that Thomas is their "head-injury child." Apparently, he is constantly getting bumps and bruises on his head and this was no surprise to them. And his mom said they had a long talk about being reverent and not picking other people up at church! Perhaps this incident will turn out to be a little blessing in helping him be more reverent - and then again, maybe not!

How to Shower

I got this email from my friend, Megan Keller. I thought it was funny enough to pass along....

Part 1 - HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown...
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower.
Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower and spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower.
Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Part 2 - HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her while making the woo-woo sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
Get in the shower.
Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower...
Spend majority of time washing privates.
Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
Throw wet towel on her pillow.

Have a great day! Oh, and... woo-woo!!!

Time Out for Women

This last weekend, I had the wonderful opportunity to go to Time Out for Women with my mother-in-law, Connie, my sister-in-law, Brenda, and my friend, Miriah Peterson. It was such a wonderful experience, and my spirit felt so uplifted. The theme for this year was Joyful Life. The scripture that they chose was Acts 2:28 - "Thou hast made known to me the WAYS OF LIFE; thou shalt make me FULL OF JOY..." Some of the other scriptures that were associated with the theme are: Psalms 98:4, Acts 8:8, Alma 26:16, and Hebrews 12:12. Friday night and Saturday we had the opportunity to listen to some of our very best....

A lot of the music on Friday night, and some of it on Saturday was provided by Mercy River. They are a new group, who sing contemporary-inspirational music. All three members of the group live in Utah, and their self-titled debut album will be released this spring. I, however, already own a copy (thanks to my wonderful, ever-giving mother-in-law), and I love it!

Our first speaker on Friday night was Wendy Watson Nelson. She was a professor and counselor for marriage and family therapy for 25 years. She is now married to Elder Russell M. Nelson (they were married in April 2006). She spoke to us about the power of questions - either for good or for bad. She said that often times asking a question will help the message linger longer - such as "Do you know how much I love you?". She also talked about how questions can give us new views on old problems. I really appreciated her comments about how we are each writing our own story - we can choose to be the victim, the survivor or the hero. And really, don't we all want to be the hero? She also talked about our need to "bury our weapons of war." Those weapons are our thoughts, feelings and/or actions that are preventing us from becoming closer to someone. Unfortunately, I have a few "weapons" that I need to work on burying - but Sister Nelson gave me hope and encouragement that I can do it!

We also had music from Jenny Oaks Baker. She plays the violin exceptionally well. I'm not a huge fan of the violin either, but her touch was amazing! I do have to say that she is a better violin player than speaker. I couldn't understand half of the songs she said that she was going to play for us. But overall, she had a funny and sweet personality!

We also got to hear from every one's favorite, Sheri Dew - finally! Everyone just really wanted to hear from her, and we were all a little disappointed when she told us that she would have to cut her talk short so that we wouldn't be there all night (I think most of us would have stayed all night just for her!). But, of course, she did beautifully and it didn't even seem like she had to skip anything. I really admired her ability to do still make a smooth flowing talk, even when she had to cut some out! Anyway, Sheri talked to us about our "Influence as Latter-day Women of God." She talked about how we need to be careful who we are choosing to be our role models - and that we should be choosing Eve and Mary as our role models. She made an excellent point that the Plan of Salvation depended upon these two women fulfilling their fore-ordained callings.

Sheri also talked about a few of the well-known women of the world, and that even though they may be doing great and wonderful things, we need to be careful about taking their counsel. We have a Prophet of God to lead and guide us in building up the Kingdom of God - these women are possibly more concerned about building up their own kingdom. I thought this was a great point, as Satan is a very cunning guy! He knows that he has to start out small and quiet so that not too many people will put up a fuss.. and then, he slowly moves in and before we know it we are completely off track! Anyway, her talk was fantastic (of course!).

Most of the music on Saturday was provided by Kenneth Cope. He is so amazing! He has a wonderful voice, and in his little blurb, it says that he is also the bishop of his ward right now! I bet he is a wonderful bishop. His songs are so inspiring, and he seems so humble and kind. It was awesome - I need to check and see what songs I am missing of his and purchase the rest!

Then we heard from Emily Watts about "Mother Guilt." It was a great way to start the day, as she had us all laughing about ourselves. Mother guilt is the guilt that we put on ourselves when things aren't perfect. Emily points out that we really need to remember that if we can't control it, it isn't something to feel guilty about! She talks about the scripture in 2 Nephi 10:23, that talks about free agency. We all love the idea of free agency - until we remember that it also applies to our children! They have a right to choose to be naughty and embarrassing, and it's just the way Heavenly Father set it up! But we CAN choose how we react to them. The one thing I really needed to hear was about our homes. She talked about how our homes may not be perfectly clean and organized, and sometimes it's a little chaotic. But our goal should be to make our home a safe place where the Spirit can abide. That's what really matters.

Then we heard from the great S. Michael Wilcox. I could have listened to him speak all day! He was amazing (as usual)! He has such a great way of applying the scriptures to our lives and making me feel like I understand them! He discussed the "Accents of Wonder" in our lives: creation, healing power of His temples, mercy and forgiveness, wonder of self, the power of His words and His love, and finally, womanhood. He compared women to the Queen in a game of chess. As a boy, Mike said he loved the knights, and would always lead with them - and he always lost. Many years later, he realized that the most powerful piece on the board was the Queen. She can go anywhere and in all directions, and when he started leading with her, he would win. He compared the world using the knights, castles, pawns and the bishops to lead and fight. But the Lord, he leads with his Queens - and He wins every time. Doesn't that just make you shiver?

Saturday afternoon we heard from Chris Stewart, who spoke on the purpose of our life on earth, and the purpose of our being. I loved when he said that the problems we have in this life were specifically chosen for us - it wasn't a random drawing. Heavenly Father knew what would make us grow.

Next we heard from Jason Wright. He wrote Christmas Jars and his newest book is The Wednesday Letters. He spoke about the power of the handwritten letter and how much more meaningful it is than an email or a text message.

Finally we heard from Sharon Larsen. She is the sister of Ardeth Kapp. She had a really great sense of humor and said quite a few things to make us giggle. She talked to us about four things that she had found allowed her to have a heart full of joy: forgiveness, trusting the Lord, letting go of competition and keeping covenants. It was a great talk to remind us of the important things!